Videos

Introduction

1. Soft White Underbelly
   • Introduction
     • Videos
       • Video #1
         Channel:- Soft White Underbelly
         Date Published:- 2020-February-22nd
         Date Added:- 2021-March-7th
         Link

Stories

1. Crack Addicted Trick interview-Patrick
   • Profile
     • Soft White Underbelly interview and portrait of Patrick, a crack-addicted trick in Los Angeles.
   •  Videos
     • Video #1
       Channel:- Soft White Underbelly
       Date Published:- 2021-January-16th
       Date Added:- 2021-January-27th
       Link
2. Crack Addict interview-Patrick (follow up)
   • Profile
     • Soft White Underbelly follow up interview and portrait of Patrick, a crack addict in Los Angeles.
   •  Videos
     • Video #1
       Channel:- Soft White Underbelly
       Date Published:- 2021-January-30th
       Date Added:- 2021-January-30th
       Link
3. Crack Addict interview-Patrick (February, 2021 update)
   • • Profile
       • Soft White Underbelly update interview and portrait of Patrick, a crack addict in Los Angeles.
     •  Videos
       • Video #1
         Channel:- Soft White Underbelly
         Date Published:- 2021-February-20th
         Date Added:- 2021-February-23rd
         Link
4. Recovering Crack Addict-Patrick (March 2021 update)
   • Profile
     • Soft White Underbelly update interview and portrait of Patrick, a recovering crack addict in Los Angeles.
   •  Videos
     • Video #1
       Channel:- Soft White Underbelly
       Date Published:- 2021-March-27th
       Date Added:- 2021-March-27th
       Link

Transcripts

Crack Addicted Trick interview-Patrick

1. Why do I have the biggest addiction of any human being ever?
2. So inconsiderate and ingregocios
   • The antidote to that feeling is to take another crack hit
3. Addiction:- “Lack of Choice it is“
4. If I take this hit
5. Changing my view about death being a negative thing
6. Just man up
7. The broken part is the mental thing
8. I have a mental thing that only the supernatural can break
9. The secret of addiction is knowing you gonna have to use

Crack Addict interview-Patrick (follow up)

1. God
   • I hope that God might take away that broken thing in my brain
   • Fight
     • The fight is never successful
     • It might be successful at single instances, but never overall
   • My own strength always fails
   • So the idea is that God will remove it
   • Like a lobotomy
   • Like something other than the need comes and I succeed, I hope it just does not come
   • The triggering mechanism needs to be removed by something other than me
   • The same brain that caused the problem can not solve the problem
   • 12 Step
     • The 12 step process tries to get you in the position that God removes it
2. Chase
   • Chase – trying to recapture the very beginning of when I first started
   • Streets
     • Streets Culture
     • When I first started out, we want
3. Change
   • We never really change
   • We might do better
4. God
   • Change
     • AAA meetings
     • Maybe I did not know them before they started changing, but you could tell they are changing
   • Angles
     • Looking at the world from angles
     • One thing is for sure, God is real
     • That God is real, is one thing that I am certain of
     • All these that I have I can accept it and not worry about it
     • Cause God is real
   • Life
     • Going about life with the one priority been to help somebody else
     • There are people that do that has a practice; has a way of life
     • And, that is sort of the goal
     • To build that way of life
     • To do little things
     • To do little things and go back and see some of the things that came up through some writing
   • Launch Out
     • And, you are able to launch out
     • And, help other people like me
     • I know people like that
     • They are very like that
     • Very attractive
     • Those are the guys that I want to be like
5. Extreme
   • Help
     • Religion
     • Exercise
   • Does not Help
     • Selfish
       • At its core of this thing is very selfish
       • Drug Addiction is a selfish thing
   • Help
     • Antidote
       • The antidote is to not think of yourself at all
       • The antidote to selfishness is to go help somebody
       • What can I do for this person
       • What can I do for that person
     • If so
       • Mark
         • Does it take courage?
         • To me, courage is a big part of all this
       • Patrick
         • I think courage comes along the way
       • Mark
         • It does not appear to be discipline
       • Patrick
         • No, Not discipline not to use
         • Yes, discipline can help
           • Not discipline not to use
           • But, disciple to do the right thing
           • Yes, discipline to right your path each day
         • Commitment to help somebody
         • Feel better when I helped somebody else
         • But, Why is it not sticking?
       • Mark
         • Altruistic and Kind
         • Impact your self worth significantly
       • Patrick
         • get past 6 months, get past 9 months
       • Shame
         • drug addictions
         • sex work
         • creates shame
6. Rehab
   • Enter Rehab
   • Go to the east coast where I have some friends
   • And, go try again
   • Mum
     • Mum says go try again
7. Die
   • What other choice
     • Die
     • Homeless
8. Care
   • Prestige
   • Money
9. Long Term Rehab
   • I am happy
10. Teen Challenge
    • The highest percent of clean
    • No Money, but who cares
11. Older I get
    • Alternate paths of life that can create happiness
12. Quick Sand
    • get out of the quicksand that you are in
13. Difference
    • You will see the difference between me not high
    • And, me high

Recovering Crack Addict-Patrick (March 2021 update)

1. Cancer
   • My addiction is the only thing that is bigger
   • This disease leaves me off better than we have been ever before
   • Helping People
   • Worried about cancer but not worried about everything else
   • For me, I am worried about everything else, but not the cancer
   • That is why we make such a good team